Do you ever wish you could turn back time and forget that ghosts exist? I do.

Maybe we'll never be functional, but at least we can be proud of our expertise in the dysfunctional. It is pretty impressive.

We're only trying to help.

You might be terrified, but at least you won't be bored.

After evaluating the evidence, I've determined that being in love with you is likely detrimental for both parties. I'll now attempt to rationalize insanity.

A cautionary tale

You knew what you signed up for.

Arguing is just another form of affection, really.